“Am I a what?” That’s probably the question that went through your mind as you read the title of this post. Seeing as how it is a relatively new term found on relationship blogs, you shouldn’t be surprised that you didn’t know what the heck I was referring to.
Sapiosexual has nothing to do with your sexual orientation; it has more to do with your dating personality, your overall interests as it pertains to dating.
Simply put, sapiosexuals are described as people who are turned on by someone’s intelligence. Instead of looking to exterior qualities to find an ideal date such as physical features or financial status, these daters are more interested in finding out what’s going on in the mind.
Does this sound like you? While you might do a double take if you spot a buff, attractive guy in a local bar, are you more turned on by his intellect? If so, it is possible that you’re a sapiosexual.
Here are some more signs that you’re more turned on by a person’s wits than their sense of style, attractive physique, or bank balance:
1. You Light Up When a Person Uses Proper Grammar
The smooth pick up lines that guy’s often use to catch a woman are not going to work on you. You’re more intrigued by the guy who is speaking proper English and talking about things like current events, business, and finance. A man who speaks impeccably is your number one turn on and when he gets going you don’t want him to stop. If you’ve found yourself swooning while having a conversation with a seemingly well educated guy, you’re a sapiosexual.
2. Books Make You Smile
If you’ve been to a guy’s house and saw he had an impressive personal library and you suddenly start smiling, chances are you’re a sapiosexual.
3. You Enjoy “Different” Dating Scenes
For some, the first date might be at a bar, restaurant, or the movies. However, if you’re a sapiosexual, then chances are you enjoy finding love in other places. This might include places like the library, bookstores, museums, and other locations that draw on a person’s intellect. You find these most attractive because they allow you to see your date in a different light. These environments are created for deep conversations where you can learn more about your date.
4. You’re Drawn to Nerds
Do you find it attractive for a man to reveal that he’s a bit of a nerd or geek? Are you turned on by the idea of him being into books, video games, comics, and even Star Wars? There’s certainly nothing wrong with this, as it simply means you want there to be more to the guy you date than what’s on the outside. Him having a passion for “nerdy” things lets you know that he’s into more than just his looks or impressing the next chick.
I’m a Sapiosexual… How Do I Find True Love?
If you recognized yourself in any of the above signs then chances are you’re a sapiosexual. This is nothing to be ashamed of; in fact you should own it proudly. Now that you know what turns you on most and what interests you more about an individual, you need to know how you can make it easier on yourself to find true love.
1. Hang Out in Places That Inspire Education
This dating advice is not meant to stereotype. You can very well find intelligent people in a bar or at a club, however, if you want to improve your chances of finding someone you’ll click with, you should try places where education is inspired. This might include hanging out at your local library, paying a visit to a museum, or visit a book store.
2. Be Open Minded
If you’ve read enough relationship blogs then you know how important it is to have an open mind when trying to find true love. Yes, a person’s intellect is ultimately what attracts you, but you have to be willing and ready to give the person a chance. They may not divulge a ton of information during the first few dates, but that doesn’t mean that they’re not intelligent. Give it some time and see where it goes.
3. Express Yourself
Some people are afraid to show that they’re more attracted to intellect or that they themselves are a bit “nerdy”. Don’t be ashamed to let your true personality shine through! The only way you’re going to find true love is if you’re open and honest from the beginning. How can you very well attract a fellow sapiosexual if you’re hiding the signs?
4. Don’t Be a Know it All
Alright, so intelligence is your strong suit. It’s also the thing that attracts you to others, but that doesn’t mean that you should become the expert in everything. You don’t have to presume to know everything, and you also don’t want to make others feel bad if they don’t know something. Continually correcting a person, interjecting to give your opinion, and disagreeing with everything they say is a surefire way to end up sitting at the table alone. Be willing to admit that you don’t know everything and also cut your date some slack.
Being a sapiosexual is something you should embrace and acknowledge. You’ve probably been this way for a long time but just didn’t know how to describe it. Now that there are relationship blogs spilling out dating advice for your personality type, you should certainly have a much easier time finding true love. Hopefully this has given you something to think about and with time you’ll find a love connection that appeals to you on all levels, the mind, body and soul.