Are the highs and low of finding love murdering your love life?
If you’ve been dating for a while you’ll probably know that dating and love don’t necessarily go together as easily as you’d like. Sure, dating could spark love but let’s be fair, it doesn’t happen all the time.
No matter how hopeful and optimistic you are, the dating game can see you feeling like you’ll never ever be able to find that special someone. You can start believing that all men are jerks and those that are not, are taken, or that you’ll never meet someone you like who likes you too. This means that the dating experience does not always feel exciting or “positive”. In fact, it can feel like a real drag.
The other day I was browsing in a clothing store and I got chatting to two women. One had been largely unhappily married for most of her 20-year marriage, the other lady was in her early 40s, a single mother of two, and she was sure that there were no good men in the world and that romance was dead.
We were chatting about the highs and lows and the pros and cons of being in an unhappy marriage–with far more cons than pros–versus being single and the sometimes discouraging and even depressing experience of dating…
It’s ironic how married people envy single people for their freedom to date and have fun, while many of the singles look at their married friends with envy. I personally think one is not necessarily better than the other. It’s all about mindset and circumstances – in fact, mindset is everything.
So, if you’re single, does dating turn you off love? Does it make you think that perhaps it’s just not worth the effort and the emotional rollercoaster?
There can certainly be a downside to dating. On your quest for true love, you might end up meeting so many men you don’t like and start feeling that you’re just wasting your time on this whole dating business. Or it could sometimes be even more disheartening — you could meet men you like, really like, and have them disappear without even bothering to explain what went wrong, known as ghosting!
Unsuccessful dating can really crush a woman’s spirit. It can make you believe that no one really wants a woman over a certain age or with kids. Or maybe your dating experience has you believing that all the good men are gone, or that they all want younger women.
Back to my story; that day at the shop, after we picked the bones of the unhappy dating experiences we’d had, my new friends and I started talking about the kind of love stories that restore one’s faith in love…
Love that comes out of nowhere and changes your whole life.
Just imagine this. You might be single, never married and now you’re 47, convinced that your chance of meeting that special man you’ve been looking for all your life was over. But then one day a friend asks you out to dinner and you secretly suspect that her husband is trying to set you up with another friend. You want to cancel because the last guy was NOT a match and you are a little bit annoyed by your friends’ attempts in matchmaking.
Yet eventually, you tell yourself “What the hell” and decide to go and at this dinner, you meet… HIM. At first, you try to avoid eye contact when you arrive, but when he’s not looking, you steal a glance across the table and you’re surprised by what you see. He catches you peeking, smiles at you and you feel a sense of relief like something has just clicked. The dinner is amazing, you laugh all night and have so much in common it’s a little uncanny.
Maybe your friends got it right this time? Maybe dating and love are not, after all, as much of a waste of time as you believed?
Fast forward 12 months and the rest is history. Love is still well and truly alive. You have finally, after all these years, after all those unsuccessful dates, met your match.
Do you think this only happens in movies and romance stories? If you do, then you are wrong! All you need to do is stop thinking of dating as hard, ungrateful work that you simply must do. If you don’t feel like dating, just give yourself a break. Rise above the dating grind and remember that there are still so many good men out there. The safe and sexy kind of love does happen in real life.
So don’t let dating give love a bad name. Whenever you feel like giving up… don’t. Take a break, then go back. When you start feeling like it’s time to shut shop and close your heart because you’re tired of it being trampled on… DON’T.
Find out how to get a man to love you wholeheartedly as if he’ll have no choice but to stay with you. Click here if you’re ready to break down the barriers to his heart and experience the most intimate, loving and heart-melting connection with the man you want.
Stay open. Keep dating. And HE WILL come along. I promise.