How many times have you said, “I wish I had a crystal ball, I’d then know what to do”?…
… I’d then know if the man I am dating is right for me, I’d know if over time the relationship will get stronger, I’d know if there was something better for me, I’d know clearly what I am doing or not doing that is stopping the love I want to enter my life?…
What if you already have a crystal ball? What if it’s always been there, but the problem is you just hardly ever look at it?
It’s easy to override our inner knowing. It’s easy to think that maybe our hunches could be wrong. Sometimes we desire something so much that we are blinded to our inner knowing.
Is there a way to remedy this?
Why Do We Ignore Our Inner Crystal Ball?
1. Instincts vs. Excitement.
Sometimes we can’t tell if we’re just feeling so excited about something that we just move towards it blindly. For example, maybe you’ve finally got confirmation that the guy you’ve been dating is really into you. Because of your intense excitement, your heart and your mind ignore the fact that you once felt that he might be a little immature.
The remedy: Mull it over and try to see if you feel the same way after the excitement is gone.
2. Over thinking.
When you’re making a big decision like agreeing to marry, move in together, move cities for someone, or have a baby, it’s rational to think things through. But even though there are times when your crystal ball already tells you to go for it, you doubt yourself….
What if things go wrong? I’ve heard that people who move in together before marriage are more likely to break up!? What if I’m not ready? What if I’m just excited? But what if your initial response to agree was perfect for you?
The remedy: First go back to your initial feeling, and rationalize that before rationalizing your counter-argument. You might need to get a wise and objective person to help you.
3. We’re afraid of being wrong.
When you make decisions, there can be so much internal pressure to make the right one. Whether we use our rationality or our gut, there will be times when we become confused and we don’t know what’s what. Also, there are times when we’re dismissive of our instincts because we recall times when it led us to what we may perceive as an undesired outcome, and we go in favour of our rationality, or what we want to believe…
It’s easy to talk ourselves into something, to justify or frame a decision in a way to suit what we want. What we want can be superficial and be feeding the ego and other superficial desires. This is when we tend to ignore the crystal ball within. So many people stay in unhealthy relationships for this very reason. They ignore their inner knowing due to unhealthy attachment.
The fact of the matter is – we can’t be “right” 100% of the time, but at least we can count on our instincts when we have no information to go on at that moment.
The remedy: Keep this in mind: Good judgment comes from poor judgement. Learn from your experiences and take conscious note of the lessons. Tune into the feelings you had at the moment and go though the process you used to go against your gut instinct. Write it down.
This will help you to learn how you override you’re inner knowing and how listen to your gut more so in the future. Most of what we do is subconscious so bring consciousness to the process.
Your crystal ball will never be an expert at predicting the outcome of your love life until you start using it. Try to trust your gut with small decisions, and who knows, the cumulative knowledge you gain from this may help your instincts to become more finely tuned and it begins with trusting you!
You can try this out when playing games, like cards, or when shopping – try buying a top you like that comes in multiple colours, which colour did you like first? Test this when buying lunch – you know what you want to eat and then your friend orders something else, you decide you want that too, you order it and once you start eating it you realise that it wasn’t what you wanted after all. The first option would have satisfied. (I have done this one).
Give your instincts a good chance to be developed. If you find yourself often saying “but I knew it”, or “that was my first choice but I changed my mind”… then it’s time to practice.
Share your personal stories below about your crystal ball experiences, you don’t have to use your real name if you don’t want to. Just make one up and remain anonymous. xx