Please listen carefully and never forget this…
When a man says he doesn’t want a relationship it means; HE DOES NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP now or with you… SIMPLE
A man tells you more about who he is and what he wants in the first two weeks of knowing him than he probably will in the proceeding weeks. And unfortunately most women do not listen and pay attention to these clear indicators.
To all the broken hearted women out there who fell for the unavailable man – cry if you need to, grieve the fantasy, and then quickly move on to an empowered place of self-love and new love.
It’s time to really get this valuable love lesson, and not only for your emotional wellbeing, this lesson will astronomically move you closer to REAL love, the kind of love that feels really good!
NOT… good, bad, good, terrible, painful, good, painful… that’s not how love is supposed to feel.
To make this all the more confusing; some men treat women well in general, even the women they sleep with yet don’t see a future with. Most women assume that because he’s nice to her that he may want something more after all.
A good guy will tell you if he only wants something casual – what you do with that information is the difference between – frustration and hurt AND finding real commitment and love.
Women make a huge mistake by thinking one or more of the following:
- He’ll change his mind once he spends more time with me
- If the sex is good enough and I please him enough he’ll commit to me
- He’ll be ready for a relationship soon and I’ll be right here, cause I’m kind of like his girlfriend anyway
- He’s so nice to me it must mean he likes me
The moment a guy tells you he doesn’t want a relationship, although he likes you enough to “hang out”, BUT not interested in anything serious is the moment that defines all…
Why would a healthy minded, high value, gorgeous woman hang out with a man when he doesn’t want a relationship, WHEN SHE DOES?
Sometimes the guy you’re spending time with may really like you, although the timing is terrible; he’s just broken up with someone and/or is still emotionally attached. Some men won’t feel ready for commitment when certain areas of their life are not as they would like it to be, such as; not happy with his career, lost his job, not divorced yet, doesn’t feel as though he’s financial successful enough for something serious, etc.
It’s still the same thing – he doesn’t feel ready, therefore he does not want a committed relationship right now. Sure, he may want to spend time with you, though it will be on his terms.
Here are my tips for you:
- Thank him for being upfront and honest
- Decide if you want something casual or not
- If you’re open to something casual you must know that that’s what it is. Casual. Nothing more.
- If not, be his friend only. Do not sleep with him. If he wants you in his life he needs to sort himself out.
- Have NO expectations. He may never sort himself or be ready.
- Do NOT fantasize what it be like to be with him – he could be a terrible partner, so do not make up a story of how amazing he is. You don’t know that. Which leads to my next point…
- You have your own life and catch up with him when it suits you only, he is NOT your priority
- Date other men and do this properly, as your priority. Be OPEN to someone who’s ready for a relationship.
- If you cannot spend time with him without having a strong yearning to be with him, or deep down you’re hoping that he’ll change his mind, then don’t see him or speak to him at all. Women make a good habit or torturing themselves. Do not see him. Move on. You have to trust that if he’s right for you, he will sort himself out and pursue you. Hanging on like a bad smell doesn’t give him space to sort himself out. You’re still there HANGING ON to whatever he’ll give you.
The man worth your time is a man you feel emotionally and physically safe around. We all know when we don’t feel this, even if we pretend or make excuses, we know! (*Side note – this applies to men with women too)
A man who’s interested in a relationship with you will:
- Be happy to wait a while before having sex
- Wants to see you during the day, not just at night (or not just for a quickie)
- You may not have sex every time you see him (it’s not all about sex)
- He will want to see you on Friday and/or Saturday nights (before 9pm!)
- After a few months he wants you to meet his friends and family
- He’ll talk about what you can do together in the future
- He’ll introduce you as his girlfriend (not as a “friend”)
So to all of the wonderful women who have fallen for Mr. Non-Commital, the lesson is; listen and hear what he has said, pay attention to his actions, and when you know something isn’t feeling quite right then it probably isn’t.
Be strong enough to walk away from someone who doesn’t want the same things as you, and do so earlier rather than later.
You’re better off single and available for the right guy, not the guy who you want to be the right guy.
MORE: If you’re ready to meet the right guy and you want to make sure you NEVER again get hooked to Mr. Wrong then this will make sure you never suffer from unnecessary heartache again => Get the love you want and deserve